As I look at my inbox pile up with a mixture of Junk, and people I should actually reply to I remember my Blog and think: “as soon as I get through my Inbox I should do that”.
Well, that is just not going to happen.
I’ve been meaning to make a new post back in January.
It is now March.
This needs to happen.
THEN I’ll clear my inbox! (which only got so big because I have left it for several days as well…)
So what has been happening that led me to convince myself that this level of procrastination was (and still is) acceptable?
Welllllllll, life has been doing some shifting lately. As life does, nothing remains the same forever. That’s just boring. This is ultimately my excuse for all procrastination:
My Financial situation has been changing, and my goal of teaching myself new skills is going to have to wait. However, in this time I realized that it’s not necessary for me to acquire new skills at all. I can still get a job in my desired industry at a company I want to work for, in a role I will be happy with, with what skills I have currently.
I’ve been focusing on Art and Programming skill development for the last few years, but the education I have is in Design (Game Design), seems odd that I’ve been avoiding it all this time…
Well for a long time, and this is kind of embarrassing to say, even with my education in it, I was actually confused as to the role of the game designer, and what they actually did (I should know this right?).
Did I just not pay attention for the entirety of my Game Design course?
You see in almost every team I’ve ever been on, everyone played the part of a Game Designer. No one ever really claimed the role of “Game Designer”, we would all just pitch ideas, and debate mechanics until we came to a relative agreement. The problem most of us overlooked with this, is that no one was organizing the ideas, testing them, and recognizing the problems with them.
Everyone was busy with their own work, no one would notice. No one would care until it was too late.
Until more recently I thought other factors like project management or communication breakdowns within the team might have been the factors to the problems. I don’t think it was any one thing that changed my perception. Just the accumulation of various different speakers I listen to, combined with the final google search for “what do Game Designers do”, that led me to not only recognize the importance of the role but of how much I would actually enjoy it.
To get to the point of how this factors into me procrastinating.
Despite putting on my resume that I have graduated from a Game Design School, that is not nearly enough to get me through the front door of a company.
Most people care about experience, and they want to see some fruit of that experience.
I’m trying to make fruit, okay?
I’m giving my fruit all my love and attention so that everyone will want a taste.
Things happen, things change; things that were once important today, tomorrow fall to the side.
In conclusion, I’m hoping to have my life back together in about a month.
Also, I’m going to be making some game dev youtube videos soon, so that’ll be fun.
When I say soon I really mean… at some point… in my future…
I don’t feel super good about this post since it’s taken me months to write it. I’m hoping to come back with some actual progress real soon, and talk about that… instead of my blundering around…